She looked so inviting in her photos, and from her description she seemed the perfect match. We met a few months ago, hit it off well, and so she came home with me.
All was good for a while, but then, I began to see a side of Jane that I didn't like. I had seen it before in others, and I knew that no good was going to come of this. At first it was the little things, but as always happens little things led to bigger things and it became clear that there was no future in our relationship.
Maybe it was the way she was raised. I don't really know what sort of home she came from. She was a foreigner, you know...not that I have anything foreigners, (I teach English as a Second Language) but when you get involved with someone who's not from around here, well, just know you're opening yourself up to all kinds of trouble.
My next relationship is going to be with a North Carolina girl, or at least a Southern one. I don't care if she likes grits or NASCAR or Tar Heel basketball, but she's got to be native to my part of the world. I'd prefer one who likes birds, and whom the birds like. And not too tall either--I don't want some 40-footer towering over me. And she has to love the sun, hot all day sun. If you know anyone like this, I'd appreciate it if you'd give me her name and tell me what you know about her.
In case you think I'm being too hard on poor Jane, let me show you a picture of what I'm talking about. And don't even let her try to blame me. I've been in relationships with others...who aren't named Jane...and everything was fine. In fact, I still see one of them every day and she will tell you how well I treat her. The problem lies wholly with Jane.
See what I mean?
Now, I've had my eye on this cute little Serviceberry...anything I should know about her???